The Changing Face of Marriage

I believe the domestic church is very important. I believe the statement, “In what might be regarded as the domestic church, the parents are to be the first preachers of the faith for their children by word and example” (Dogmatic Constitution on the Church, Lumen Gentium, #11), is very telling. The parents help the children and in many ways the children teach the parents. The domestic church is important because it creates a safe place where everyone is supported. The domestic church creates a community where love and forgiveness are embodied. The domestic church strengthens the family dynamic, community and values. The changing structure of marriage is complex and has many pros and cons. In today’s society, living with someone before he or she is married is very casual and may happen even if the relationship is not that serious. One pro is that the two people get to know each other better, since they would be living together. I believe the cons out weigh the pros because one special part of marriage is moving in together and starting a new life. Some people casually move in together because it is convenient, when it should be seen as sacred. In TV and movies today, moving in with another person is not seen as a big deal and is portrayed as if every one does it. Lastly, the study about the correlation between marriage, divorce and college degrees is very interesting. Since statistics keep going down as a person moves onto college and their chances of getting divorced decrease, the statistic is in favor of us. As we all move onto college, the statistic is relatable. I think as I get older, a domestic church will be established. I believe it is important to have a space of love, community and forgiveness.

Some Say Love...

I think that as we learn and grow older, we learn the many qualities that we may be looking for in a committed relationship. I think every person may look for something different in a dating relationship. For me, I look for someone who makes me happy and would be there even when times are tough. I also seek qualities of someone who would care for me and knows me. I want someone who knows how I am and accepts me with my flaws. I also want someone who can laugh and understand my humor. Lastly, in reference to agape love, someone who is self-less and who I feel the same way about. Although agape love may be difficult to achieve I think it does exist. I also believe that many relationships are illustrated in music by the lyrics. . The first song is by Justin Timberlake, “Mirrors”, speaks about how the other person completes him. The lyrics state, “Aren't you something' to admire, cause your shine is something' like a mirror
And I can't help but notice, you reflect in this heart of mine
If you ever feel alone and the glare makes me hard to find
Just know that I'm always parallel on the other side”. These lyrics exemplify and state how the person is always on the other side waiting and supporting the other. Next, Coldplay’s “Green Eyes” says, “Honey you are a rock Upon which I stand / and I came here to talk / I hope you understand / the green eyes, yeah the spotlight, shines upon you / and how could, anybody, deny you / I came here with a load / and it feels so much lighter now I met you / and honey you should know / that I could never go on without you”. These lyrics illustrate the never-ending support and love he has for the other person. Next, “Faithfully” by Journey says, “Ain't always what it's supposed to be / Oh Girl / you stand by me / I'm forever yours / Faithfully” This is implies that no matter what, they will be together forever, standing by one another. Another song, which illustrates love, is “Lover of the Light” by Mumford and Sons. The lyrics, “But I'd be yours if you'd be mine / Stretch out my life and pick the seams out / Take what you like but close my ears and eyes / Or watch me stumble over and over / I had done wrong you built your tower / But call me home and I will build a throne / And wash my eyes out never again / But love the one you hold / And I will be your gold / To have and to hold / A lover of the light” illustrates that he may have made mistakes but they will work things out. This also shows to love the one you are with. Lastly, “Wanted” by Hunter Hayes says, “You know I'd fall apart without you/ I don't know how you do what you do/ 'Cause everything/ that don't make sense about me / Makes sense when I'm with you”. These lyrics illustrate the idea of another completing another. In this connection, this would be seen as a soul mate. . In the article, they state that the quest for a soul mate is almost unattainable. Something the article said that I agree with is that many times people search for a title, just to feel comfortable. I do believe that finding a soul mate is not impossible and can happen. The agape love that would exist among soul mates is possible.

Gender and Dating Relationships

In correlation to the article, I agree with some statements made, but disagree with others. Although I disagree with some ways our culture presents marriage, I do not see a problem with tradition, such as the man proposing or the woman taking his name. I do not think it is demeaning to a girl to be proposed to. In agreeing with the article, I do not believe that marriage should be some type of a surprise. I think that the couple should have discussed the situation prior and know that marriage is mutual and right for both of them. I do not see a problem in surprising the person on the day of the proposal. I think there is a difference between an unexpected proposal and a surprise on the day of the proposal. I think whatever makes the couple happy is decided between them. In answering the reader’s questions I think both men and women have expectations about marriage. In comparing to my parents’ love story, traditional plans were kept. My parents discussed getting married and knew they were going to get engaged, but my mom did not know when or how my dad would propose. My parents discussed and decided they wanted to get married, but my mom did not know she would be proposed to after a Phillies game. I do not think the tradition of a man proposing to a woman is harmful. I think that every circumstance is different for each couple.

Dating: What's the Point?

In chapter 5 of David Cloutier’s book, the concept of dating being a means to practice for divorce is discussed. I disagree with this claim. I do not believe that dating is just a means to have sex. I also do not believe dating is a practice for divorce. I agree with the contrary that dating is essentially a way to learn and grow. I think from dating, we learn more about ourselves. One quote that stood out to me was, “We see the values we find in all human relationships.” From dating, we have many new experiences emotionally. We can learn a lot about others and ourselves from dating. I also believe dating depends on the people. One person may approach dating as completely physical, while another person desires an emotional connection. Ultimately I think dating depends on each person’s opinion. In our society today, dating may be see as a way to just be physical with someone. In the contemporaries view, they claim dating is caring for another person “in a way that is often deeper than a friendship”. The anti-daters argue the contrary. Finally, in colleges and high schools “the hook-up” culture is different. Many times today people “hook up” with someone they do not know. I think this is unnecessary. People are “hooking up” with someone whose name they do not know and someone they do not care for. I think dating today is sometimes not taken seriously due to this culture today.

Little Women

The documentary and article Misrepresentation brings forth a problem in today’s society and culture of women being objectified and sexualized. Although I did know this is a problem in society, evident from the media, magazines, television and even the news, I was unaware of the young age objectification begins. I was surprised to hear of the thong underwear manufactured for 7 to 10 year olds or the increasing rate of plastic surgery. I was also saddened by shows such as Toddlers and Tiaras or many of the reality shows. The media as well as stores, such as Abercrombie and Fitch always advertise girls as “sexy” or hanging all over a boy. The media and stores present women as objects and as if their only goal should be to look gain a man. This problem must change in the upcoming years. As a young woman currently, it is hard not to imagine what the future holds for women, especially in the workplace. It is astonishing to hear that some women may not get jobs, although they are more than qualified. Women are presented as over aggressive while competing for a job while a man as seen as the leader. Attending the Mount definitely has affected my understanding of gender and identity. I believe the Mount does educate us to be strong leaders with integrity and women who should stand up for what we believe in. Although as the documentary pointed out, the work place and world is very different. We must be the instruments of change and stand up for what we believe in.

Sources of My Identity

As I have grown up, many factors have been a source of and influenced my identity. The main things that have been sources of my identity are my friends and family, school and service, and athletics. The first influence is my friends and family. My parents and my older brothers, Rob and Ryan, have influenced me in a tremendous way. I am very close with my family and they are very important to me. I grew up where mostly every night we would sit down for dinner together and talk about our day and spend time together on the weekends. My parents have raised me into the person I am today with strong values. My brothers have taught me many things and have given me great advice. My friends have also taught me many things and I know I can count on them. The next source of my identity is school. As I have gotten older, I have learned school is more than just a place to take tests and write papers. Although one of the fundamental parts of school is learning, the experience in general has shaped me. I have learned so many things from being at school. One thing is the desire to learn and be inquisitive. School has also taught me to work hard and to stay diligent. At school, the extracurricular activities have played a huge part in my identity. From student council to CSC, getting involved is something I love to do. Going to LaSalle Academy and helping organize events around the school has taught me to always remain grounded and focus on the positives. Lastly, athletics have played a large role in my identity. When I was younger from about the age of 5 I played almost every sport there was. I played athletics all the way through high school from Mount to club to CYO teams. Sports have taught me to work hard and work alongside other people. I will never forget the volleyball team at Mount Saint Joseph Academy. Waking up early during the summer for preseason ending with winning the AACA championship is one of my greatest memories from my athletics. We worked hard together all season for an end goal. Athletics in general has taught me determination, persistence and leadership. These many sources and influences have shaped me into the person I am today.

Mission

I will live out my passion of helping others and making people happy. I will utilize my qualities to make people laugh and smile and encourage people live life to the fullest. I will work my hardest and strive for greatness. I will remain a loyal friend and family member. I will never give up and remain optimistic, even when times get tough. I will stay confident and stand up for what I believe in. I have learned so much from my experiences with others and want that to continue. I want to encourage others to avoid pointless drama and live life without hatred. We must learn from, respect and love one another.